37994: Dec 7, 2007

The Over-Rated, Social Life

I love people, so lets get that right out of the way. Therefore, Im not anti-social: it's more like selectively non-social. Whats the difference? Well, let me describe my previous life. I was married to a social butterfly. My wife liked company all the time.

Not that I wasnt a good partner, its just that there was only one of me. She preferred multiple contacts in every situation possible. We began going to church shortly after my daughter was born. But we did more than simply attend: we got involved. That meant, becoming members of various groups. The Bible-study group, the newcomers group, the planning committee and so forth. Not only did we go to Sunday service, we had additional meetings every week. This continued for several years. During that time, she also got us into neighbor watch programs, Bunko groups and work-related events. Every weekend meant a new commitment at our house or someone elses.

I had to adapt to this new lifestyle where our social-base grew exponentially at an alarming rate. We barely had a free evening for time by ourselves. My wife reveled in her friends and enjoyed the chance to talk and mingle. I was content to follow her lead and joined in the fray. But it took its toll. Initially I didnt mind the whirlwind interactions and found many of our friends interesting and compatible.

But not everyone. I found I didnt mesh with some of the church people. Oh, I was accepted, but with whom I had nothing in common. This was true for a proportion of some of our neighbors. They were polite and accommodating, but not really interested in us as friends. Perhaps our social status or other issues muddied the waters. In any regard, we werent quite up to their standards.

At various parties, we or they would host, I noticed that I would ask them a slew of questions about their work or life without a single question about myself coming in return. This occurred with an increasing frequency. Conversations were always about their latest exploits or work. They talked about their travels. They talked about their children. They talked about their hopes, dreams, and successes. If I even attempted to interject something about myself, it was tolerated for mere moments until they lost interest. Then it was back to their world.

I know that this goes on for everyone reading this article. Its just that perhaps its a best-kept secret no one likes to admit or discuss. I realized how much I began to dread the endless social scene when we changed churches and got even more involved, if it were possible. We were founding members and threw ourselves into every aspect of that institution. We helped with fundraising, activities, the music, the administration, the search for a new building, and the promotion. We were part of many groups and our social endeavors widened even farther.

Now I practically had no individual life and was ruled by a calendar. If it was Friday, it was the Jones. Saturday, the Smiths. Sunday was church, followed by a church lunch. Then Bible study in the afternoon. Wednesday was Bunko night, Thursday a birthday party, friends retirement or anniversary. Add in just plain dinner parties every weekend and there you have it. I was not relishing the days that were flashing by filled with a sea of faces, small talk, hor douvres, and constant chatter. I was burned out.

Then tragedy struck out of nowhere. My wife died and everything changed in an instant.

Its now years later, and Im lucky enough to have found a new love and remarried. I miss some of the old friends but none of the hectic pace. My first wife loved the social gatherings and I thank her for the journey into that life. But now I have a few select friends I really care about and thats okay with me. The days of endless socializing are done and Ive moved on. I imagine there are other people that can relate to my account and I have some words of wisdom. I went along with my wifes way of living because I loved her and it made her happy. That was my mission as a good husband. But I could change anything, I would have made my position known years ago and perhaps spared myself of many uncomfortable situations. So talk to your significant other if you are trapped in a social quagmire and dont be afraid to be honest. I promise, theyll still be your friend.

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An Unthought About Decision

Most of the time we barely think about what the true consequences of a bad decision can be, and on those occasions when we do think about the consequences, we usually end up lying to ourselves. We find some way to justify what were doing and make it seem not as bad as it really is. I use to think like this until I experienced the consequences of a truly bad decision. Let me explain; I heard that some people were going to be drinking at the school football game and thought itd be fun to be wasted at the game. I drove to the school around the time we agreed to meet up to start drinking. We all sat in my parents car in the school parking lot drinking out of the bottle getting drunk. I didnt think about how I was going to get home, I couldnt drive home being as intoxicated as I was, but I figured Id worry about getting home later.

We walked into the football game and I dont remember much after that. About 20 minutes into the game I blacked out and when I became conscious again I was in a hospital bed with my mom at the side. I didnt remember how I got to the hospital or anything. The next morning I was faced with many questions, most of them having to do with why I drank, how I was going to get home, what could I of been thinking making a decision like that? I really didnt have answers for these questions, because theyre all pretty much based on why I didnt make a better decision. I didnt think about what would happen if I got caught, how it would affect my life, what consequences there would be.

There were many consequences I had to face from my bad decision, but the worst ones to me were losing the trust of my parents, getting my license taken away, I have to pay an over two thousand dollar hospital bill, and my grades in school dramatically slipped. I now find myself thinking on a more than weekly basis why didnt I think the decision through? How could I have made such a bad decision?

The next time youre going to make a bad decision thatll have negative consequences, take a minute to actually think about what the possible consequences will be if you get caught or something goes wrong, and how they will affect your life. Then make your decision.

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The Value of Antique Cuckoo Clocks

As cuckoo clocks have been around since 1730 and have always been manufactured by gifted artists and skilled craftsmen, many of the older pieces that have been even minimally cared for are still in existence today. A well-preserved cuckoo clock from the 18th or 19th century can bring a kings ransom at any of the prestigious auction houses around the world. Bidding can easily get up into the millions for a certified, pristine Schneider cuckoo clock in perfect working condition. Available in auction houses and high-priced boutiques around the world, antique cuckoo clocks are prized for their hand carved scenes, whimsical displays and attractive facades.

The familiar cuckoo sound on the half hour and on the hour never fails to turn heads. There is something about the unique call of the cuckoo, a bird that lays her eggs in the nests of other birds and then abandons her young to be raised by others, that hits a harmonious chord in the human psyche. Surely there are better behaved birds to signal the arrival of a new hour, and certainly any number of our aviary friends utter sweeter sounds that could have been employed to usher in that eagerly anticipated lunch hour. For some reason, the cuckoo clock became a worldwide phenomenon during a time when one part of the world was hardly aware of the goings in another.

The cuckoo clock was comparable to the automobile of its era, or the airplane of its time. Any well preserved, functioning example of its humble beginnings is worth a kings ransom today. Even on Ebay where items are sold as cheaply and quickly as possible, true antiques are sometimes listed for many thousands of dollars before the bidding is even close to being finished. If youve got an antique cuckoo clock, take good acre of it and, should the need arise, it will take good care of you.

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